DAY ONE of the ROUND of 32
10 Things to Watch
1. (1) Villanova vs (8) NC State - 7:10pm EST - TBS
Well, yeah, I mean... it's not like you're not going to watch this game. You'd have to have come out of your psychosis pretty early to miss this one. Did your terrible bracket skills wake you up when UAB beat Iowa State on Thursday? Have you quit watching because your team is already out of the tournament? What a weak spirit you have.
Anyways, this should be a fun matchup for both adults and children alike. It's fun for adults because the advertising that takes place during the game and during broadcast breaks are targeted directly towards you! Congratulations! It's fun for children because they get to see their favorite android - Ryan Arcidiacono - battle a pretty 'meh' Wolfpack squad. I've heard from sources that Archie switched to lithium Ion batteries for the tournament as a marketing scheme to get American motor companies on board with all-electric vehicles. How noble!
NC State was pretty mediocre in the opening round tilt against Kentucky's punching bag LSU - while Villanova looked like the Avengers 2 as they decimated Lafayette. But, hey, ACC vs Big East! Watch the game!
2. (6) Xavier vs (14) Georgia State - 6:10pm EST - TNT
Myles Davis will unfortunately be playing basketball instead of the trumpet as the Musketeers welcome the belle of the West region ball Georgia State in this round of 32 matchup. As cool as Davis sounds while riffing on the court with Stainbrook and the hot, new sensation Bluiett, the Musketeers should be Abell to quell the cinderella story and march Farr past the upset-minded Georgia State squad.
If I were you, I'd mute the telecast of this game and play some smooth Jazz instead. It'll make you look sophisticated and women across the country will flock to you - especially if you pair it with Axe bodyspray.
3. (4) Georgetown vs (5) Utah - 7:45pm EST - CBS
This will probably be the best game of the day. Utah is really good and Georgetown is Georgetown. Did you know that? Why are you even considering not watching this game? Too consumed by Hilliard and his robot companion? Unbelievable. You should be ashamed.
D'Vauntes Smith-Rivera vs Delon Wright. That's all you need to know.
4. (3) Notre Dame vs (6) Butler - 9:40pm EST - TBS
If you're from Indiana then you're either weeping over the Hoosiers losing yesterday or you're very excited about this matchup. Personally I think the state of Indiana is a pretty terrible place, but all opinions aside this should be a lot of fun. Notre Dame put away the mighty pesky Northeastern squad in the round of 64 while Butler took the Longhorns out to the pasture and let them down easy.
Roosevelt Jones sprained his knee on Thursday but has been cleared to play today against the Fighting Irish. Sources close to the situation say that Roosevelt Jones has super-human abilities to heal himself but also stated that his shooting motion is still strange and confusing.
5. (1) Kentucky vs (8) Cincinnati - 2:40pm EST - CBS
Hahahahaha. Sorry Bearcats.
6. (4) North Carolina vs (5) Arkansas - 8:40pm EST - TNT
Arkansas managed to squeak by Wofford in the round of 64 by playing SEC basketball. SEC style of basketball is arguably the most difficult to watch, but the fact that Arkansas's roster is full of really bizarre looking individuals makes watching them a whole lot of fun. Michael Qualls and Bobby Portis headline the tournament thus far as "weird looking guys good at basketball." They're fun and you should definitely flip over to this game when the Nova, Xavier & Georgetown games are on commercial break simultaneously (which will happen).
Also, North Carolina is the opponent to Arkansas. Ironically, they beat Harvard by two. Harvard beat North Carolina by 1200 points on the pregame SAT test.
RIP Dean Smith.
7. (11) UCLA vs (14) UAB - 12:10pm EST - CBS
Steve Alford and his Bruins knocked off SMU in the round of 64 on Thursday much to the chagrin of an aging Larry Brown. UAB had their football program shuttered this last fall and decided to take out some frustration on Iowa State. There are a lot of cute story lines in the tournament thus far (Georgia State coach & his torn ACL, blazing trails by allowing a robot to play in the NCAA Tournament for the first time, Dayton getting to play home games because their fans are insufferable) but the fact that UAB dropped a sports program only to make the tournament and beat a REALLY good 3-seeded Iowa State squad makes them the most adorable sports story of March Madness. Let us join hands, raise them to the skies and pray for UAB to beat Kentucky in the National title game. Or, at the very least, take care of Alford and his Bruins.
8. (2) Arizona Wildcats vs (10) Ohio State Buckeyes - 5:15pm EST - CBS
I really don't like Thad Matta and I think the PAC-12 is one of the best basketball conferences in the country. Arizona plays a swell style, stifling their opponents with great defense while cashing in with easy buckets on the offensive end. Ohio State just won some stupid trophy for football so they deserve to lose this game by default. They don't deserve any more trophies. Also their mascot is dumb and I hate them.
Last night, while watching Providence play the referees and the Dayton Flyers, I wondered what the meaning of life was. As I peered into the eyes of the crowd as they hooted and hollered, proudly wearing their red and blue while taking up 3/4 of the lower bowl of the Columbus Arena, I pondered why the NCAA had decided it to be a good idea to give Dayton a chance at playing, what should be a neutral court environment, a few home games. I asked, "Was it because they gave them a worse seed, so they had to make up for it?"
Then I saw Kris Dunn get a technical foul. I saw ticky-tack fouls completely interrupting the game of basketball while the home court crowd roared on. I saw Ed Cooley throw a chair, an action that happened in the heat of passion, then get T'd up for it. The crowd swelled and screamed as each Providence run was halted as Dayton made a momentum killing 3.
Referees have been quite schizophrenic across the board thus far. Keep an eye on them, especially when the pendulum begins to swing one way.
10. Potential Upsets
Cincinnati could potentially beat Kentucky if the Kentucky bus breaks down on the way to the arena, giving the Bearcats an advantage to score with no defensive opposition for a while. Even with a 50 point cushion at half, I still think Kentucky would pull that one off.
I don't consider UAB beating UCLA an upset. Sure, they have a higher seed, but I'm pretty sure the sports Gods are completely on their side.
Butler may beat Notre Dame if the 3's aren't falling for the Irish. Butler will have to score more points than the Irish to win.
Stainbrook and the Davis duo will give Georgia State all they can handle. If the divines come into play in this one and Georgia State manages to beat the Musketeers then Xavier fans will know that it was truly never meant to be.