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Bluejays Defend Home Nest; Boot Out Owls 81-55

Birds of prey bullied by a very pretty bird.

Big East Basketball Media Day Photo by Mitchell Layton/Getty Images

Ty-Shon Alexander scored the first six points of the game by making back to back threes. Both were in transition, the first off a steal by Zegarowski, the second on a transition off a missed shot.

The game was over at that point. Zegarowski buried the Owls on a three in transition off an assist from Mitch Ballock at the 17:11 mark. Alexander would start the game 3-for-3 from beyond the arc, Zegarowski would end up with 10 points and three assists before the ten minute mark, and it became an exercise in patience for the game to reach its preconceived conclusion.

That is, of course, until they turned the gravity off. At the 6:45 mark the fine folks at the CHI Health Center Arena Stadium Space Launch Facility flipped the switch and the place went dark. The fans eagerly sat on their hands, falling silent before the formal announcement was made. The collective click of seatbelts littered the empty air as a man in a formal tophat was lowered to half court. He was the gravity master.

He controlled the crowd with every movement. He held them silent for the equivalent of a lifetime for some of the folks. Bodies dropped in anticipation. Then, with the flick of the wrist, he flipped the switch and the players, coaches, referees, and goals began to float in the open air.

The fans went wild. screeching like a child who just saw an alt-right youtube video on accident on their iPad for the first time. They didn’t think it’d come in the first game of the season, that’s something they typically hold off on until conference play.

When the gravity was no longer a factor, the Bluejays went to work. The first half of play was so-so, but when they were able to gain momentum from the jump in the second half it became a bloodbath of epic proportions. Shereef Mitchell became a defensive stopper, floating in space as the Kennesaw team tried desperately to navigate the anti-gravity atmosphere.

The lead billowed to 25, then to 27. The cadets on the home side of things flourished; the aforementioned Mitchell was able to connect to cadet Christian Bishop on a lofty alley-oop that left the fans reaching for their buckles, trying to break free from their constraints so they could float to the perimeter of the court to show their pleasure for the play. Only a few broke free but the security team was able to re-fashion them to their seats.

In the end, the Bluejays were able to accumulate a great deal of style points to impress the Basketball Gods. Kennesaw State just seemed too afraid of the change in ability to play “classical basketball,” leaving them listless and unable to capitalize on any mistakes.

At one point during the game the fans were gifted an opportunity to acquire free personal sized pizzas. This tradition is as old as the beer taps in the arena; it’s something Bluejay fans expect. Space cadet Jordan Scurry was the one who changed the momentum of the ball at the perfect angle to see that these fans could collect on their gift; he forced the ball into the goal from beyond the 2+ point mark to give the Bluejays 75 points.

It wasn’t a close affair. The fans eventually floated to the exits early as this was a late game, starting at 8pm. Most folks have to work H3 mining jobs when the sun suddenly presents itself, so it’s understandable why they got into their spaceships and went home before the clock hit zero.

Creighton’s Cadets will play Michigan’s Spaceboys one week from today.